35-Year-Old With $3 Million Net Worth Making $250K A Year Says Despite Hitting All Financial Goals, He's Miserable — 'I Feel Dead Inside'

Reaching financial independence by 35 is the dream. At least, that's what the FIRE community would have you believe.

FIRE—short for Financial Independence, Retire Early—is a movement where people aggressively save, invest, and try to exit the rat race decades ahead of schedule. Skip the daily commute, skip the boss, and live life on your own terms.

But for one user on Reddit's r/FIRE subreddit, hitting every financial milestone didn't come with freedom. It came with burnout.

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He's 35, married with two kids, earns $250,000 a year in a high-stress corporate role, and runs a startup projected to earn $90,000. His net worth? Over $3 million. That includes $2.5 million in brokerage accounts, $200,000 in retirement, $30,000 in cash, and a home worth $650,000—with only $300,000 left on the mortgage at 2.25%. Two cars are paid off, and the third is nearly there.

He's done it all right. And yet?

"I don't think I've ever been more miserable," he wrote.

"I feel dead inside and I don't like who I've become. I feel like I can't enjoy anything anymore, even hobbies I once really enjoyed. I can't recall the last time I was actually happy or honestly what that even really felt like."

He said he's losing sleep, spending hours staring at the ceiling, thinking about the years he's sacrificed. He goes through the motions, smiling for his family, pretending things are fine.

"If only one of us has to be miserable, it should be me. No need to bring them down too."

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For a community obsessed with asset allocation and early retirement math, the response was strikingly emotional. Users didn't toss spreadsheets at him—they tossed support.

One person asked, "How did you get a $3 million portfolio in 13 years making $250K or less?"

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Another replied, "Lots of risk is the answer."

Someone else said, "Sounds like OP is trading time and life experiences for money. And now found themselves entirely empty."

The thread turned quickly from admiration to intervention.

"You should probably talk to a mental health professional. Not a financial forum."

"Walk away from the corp job to focus on your startup for one year… Spend more time with the kids and wife."

"You can't get back those years of your youth. They're worth more than $250K a year."

See Also: Can you guess how many retire with a $5,000,000 nest egg? The percentage may shock you.

And the harshest but most honest comment of all?

"If it makes you feel any better, I feel this way with almost $3 million less than you."

This entire crisis tracks with what psychologists call the hedonic treadmill—the idea that happiness levels may shift briefly after life changes but eventually drift back to a personal baseline. According to Psychology Today, that baseline isn't the same for everyone, and a person can have different set points for emotional highs versus overall life satisfaction.

In other words, your life can look fantastic on paper and still feel emotionally bankrupt.

So maybe FIRE isn't the finish line after all. Maybe it's the starting line for a harder question: what are you really chasing? Because no amount of brokerage accounts or early retirement plans will buy back your 30s—or the peace you expected to find once you got here.

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