Mom Asks Suze Orman: 'Did We Create A Monster?' 23-Year-Old Daughter Has $250K Saved But Refuses To Pay For Dates Or Family Outings

Most parents would be thrilled if their 23-year-old had already stacked a quarter of a million dollars in investments. Not this mom.

Julie, a listener of "Suze Orman's Women & Money" podcast", wrote in with a dilemma that had both Suze and her cohost KT raising eyebrows—and laughing a little too.

"Have we created a monster?" Julie asked, in what Suze Orman called one of the best subject lines they'd seen.

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Julie and her husband, who've lived below their means for decades and now boast a net worth of over $6 million, made it their mission to teach their kids how to save and invest early. And it worked—almost too well. Their 23-year-old daughter, a full-time grad student, already has over $250,000 saved in a Roth IRA and non-retirement investment accounts.

How? "She has accumulated this through jobs she's had for years, as well as our annual gift of a match to what she contributes to her Roth," Julie explained.

But here's the problem: their daughter refuses to spend money on, well… anything.

"In my opinion, she has a toxic attitude towards money," the mom wrote. "She constantly says she cannot afford things and never offers to pay for anything when she's on a date with her boyfriend or when she's with friends or family."

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Julie added that while her daughter studies hard and is always hustling to earn more, she's also become what she calls "miserly."

Cue co-host KT's reaction: "Mom thinks her daughter's a miser," she said, laughing. But KT didn't see anything wrong with a 23-year-old who's obsessed with saving. "I wouldn't do a thing, mom," she added. "Any kid that's 23 that wants to work and earn money and save money and accumulate money is a good thing."

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Orman, however, wasn't ready to let the daughter completely off the hook. "Mom's saying she's miserly because she never pays for anything because she doesn't think she can afford it," she clarified.

Still, Orman made it crystal clear that this kind of saving habit is not a red flag—it's a financial flex.

"These are her compounding years," she said. "For every dollar she saves over the next 40 years, when she's in her 60s, it's going to multiply so much because of compounding… She's on the path to being far wealthier than both you and your husband."

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So what should parents do when their daughter's on the fast track to millionaire status but won't split a dinner bill?

Orman suggested one tactical move: stop matching her Roth IRA contributions.

"She has enough," she said. "You can simply say, ‘You're doing so great, we're not going to match you anymore. You're on your own.'" It's not about punishing her—it's about letting her feel the difference between earned money and gifted money. "Let's just see what that does to her," she added.

As for the boyfriend footing the bill? "Let them decide that between themselves," Orman added. "But you have not created a monster. You've created a money maven, if you ask me."

Bottom line: Teaching your kids to save might just work better than expected—but don't be surprised when frugality shows up at the dinner table.

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