She Cares For Her Disabled Adult Son Alone. When Child Support Replaced Shared Housing Costs, His SSI Was Cut To $0

When a parent cares full-time for a disabled adult child, Social Security rules can add unexpected financial hurdles. One mother recently shared her story on the r/SocialSecurity subreddit after learning that child support payments — mandated by her state — would completely wipe out her son's Supplemental Security Income, or SSI, benefits.

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From Shared Expenses to Child Support

For years, the woman and her now-estranged husband raised their son together. Their adult son, who has a profound developmental disability, qualified for SSI at age 18. While his benefit was already reduced by one-third due to living rent-free with his parents, the family was managing. The father's income covered most of the housing expenses, while the mother — unable to work full-time due to caregiving needs — stayed home with their son.

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Following the couple's separation, the mother became the sole caregiver and lost the household income once contributed by her husband. To meet the state's legal requirements and maintain support for their son, the father was ordered to pay child support, since the adult child cannot live independently.

Why the Child Support Caused SSI to Drop

Under SSI rules, any child support paid directly — or even indirectly — for a disabled adult is considered unearned income. SSI benefits are reduced dollar-for-dollar by most unearned income after a $20 general exclusion. So even though the child support is meant to replace the father's share of household expenses, it's treated differently than when he simply lived in the home and paid the bills.

In this case, the mother determined that once child support begins, her son's monthly SSI benefit of $644.67 – plus $44 in state assistance – will drop to zero.

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Complex Rules With Real-Life Impacts

This change highlights a quirk in SSI regulations: in-kind support and maintenance, such as  free shelter, reduces benefits, but cash support like child support can eliminate them entirely. When the father lived in the household, SSA reduced the benefit by only one-third to account for the son receiving free housing. But with parents' divorce and father moving out, his contribution will now be in the form of child support — effectively cancelling the benefit. With the one-third reduction for housing and the subtraction of the child support "income," the son's disability benefit will be reduced to $0 — even though the mother's financial situation has worsened.

Commenters on the subreddit pointed out that this rule can create a disincentive to report or receive child support at all, unless the amount exceeds the maximum SSI benefit. 

One suggestion: have the support money redirected to an ABLE account, a tax-advantaged savings account for individuals with disabilities. Deposits into an ABLE account, if done correctly, may not count against SSI limits.

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Others advised that this mother consult her divorce attorney to possibly negotiate alimony instead of child support. These approaches may protect SSI eligibility while still ensuring her son receives support.

While these approaches may help in certain situations, they don't account for the fact that the child support is mandated by the state the family lives in. 

The Bottom Line

This story reflects a broader challenge faced by families caring for disabled adult children: SSI's strict and often confusing income rules don't always align with real-world caregiving situations. When financial responsibility shifts after divorce, understanding how different types of support are counted can make a significant difference in long-term income and stability.

If you're navigating a similar situation, it's wise to consult both a family law attorney and someone experienced with SSI rules — such as a disability benefits advocate or a Social Security expert.

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